One thing which was wondering in my head for a couple of month now and I urgently wanted to write about… Sometimes you meet people who are really inspiring and have a massive impact on your life. Bri and I had such an encounter and I am very glad we still have this very unique connection. Thank you for disrupting my life!

Being happy and content with yourself.

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I have been asked a few times during my journey and also have thought about this a lot – What makes you/me happy? There are many little factors which make you happy. These triggers are very different from person to person. For me it is a close connection with nature, spending time outside, hiking uphill, meeting and exchanging with people who are important to me, good food and many more things make me happy. But one thing which is even way more important and sits above all of these little happenings in life is being completely happy and content with ourselves. The long, intensive and for quite a stretch also hard and painful process I went through in New Zealand actually brought me to the point where I was so happy and content as I had never been before in my life (the eternal reminder…). It’s the feeling and realisation that you can only be happy and content if you are “clean” with yourself. It’s the feeling when you can spend time with yourself without feeling awkward or lonely. Very important is also not to expect anything from outside to make you happy but that you are happy from your deep inside only. As long as you are depending on others to be happy you are not balanced and you will at one point of time fall. This process has continued for me and has become even stronger during the last month. Also realising the point when you drift away from this state and to actively steer against it was important. Sometimes during the last year I came to the point where I was not completely “high” and mostly because certain things did not happen or I was disappointed by certain things or people. But especially then it is important to start at yourself and take responsibility – it’s only up to you to go back to your equilibrium.

Being judgemental.

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One thing Bri challenged me with was being judgemental in certain situations. Criticism of course hurts and in the beginning it is natural to discharge it. Especially if you think of yourself of being the opposite – open-minded, liberal and appreciating difference as an enrichment. Having realised that there is never a right or wrong but only different perspectives. But eventually it starts working on you and you can’t stop the process of reflecting on this issue. And she was and is right. We are all working with stereotypes in our life. It is a helpful tool. It helps us to judge unknown situations and act. This can be very helpful in dangerous situations so we don’t lose time. And it’s also very easy in normal life to look at someone and say this person has a certain characteristic and is therefore a or b. But this restricts us from an open and unprejudiced interaction. Bri said: “You never know the entire story about someone. Maybe this is something which makes them happy or it is the maximum they can reach or do based on their story!”. I still catch myself looking at things and judging quickly. And actually I should know better. It is exactly what I should have learned from Pengu and his story (Pengu)! But I guess awareness is the first step…

Unconditional love.

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And another important lesson I have learned is the one about “unconditional love”. Bri seemed crazy to me from an outside perspective (…and she still does 😋) and loves everyone for what he/she is. Unconditional. It’s actually the same as the concept of being happy with yourself. If you don’t expect anything only then you are truly able to give and receive. And this does not only apply to relationships between partners but to every relationship. Not wanting and expecting anything from someone puts you into the position to fully accept this person – unconditionally. This is amazing because you don’t have the need to change or convince this person from anything. But you can just stay connected without restrictions or imbalances. You don’t have to disregard someone because values, ideas, expectations or other things do not match. You can just enjoy what is there. It might sound a bit weird but this thought and reflection has kept me busy during the last month. And I think it’s a very important part of being happy as well. It frees you from disappointments, frustration and losing people in your life which are important for you.

These thoughts have kept me busy during the last weeks and month. And they now seem to be clear and tangible. It has made certain things a lot easier and enjoyable. Another important and tangible step on this journey. Thank you Bri for sharing your world with me, helping me grow and this unconditional friendship!